For the past two months I have been dreading this coming weekend. Most of the time I’ve been able to ignore the growing anxiety within me but now that the weekend is almost here, I can’t ignore it anymore. My babies are leaving for nine days and will be five hours away in a completely different state.
And during that entire time they’re gone, it’s going to feel like a part of me is missing. I’m going to miss their voices…their laughter. Their smiles. Even their arguing over stupid things they shouldn’t be arguing over.
Five hours may not seem like a lot to some people, but it’s light years away when your child gets hurt. And I know if something were to happen to either of my kids, I would have a hard time remaining sane on the way to them. The thought of that terrifies me, and I pray the entire time they’re gone that they’ll be okay.
>I know some may criticize me, and others like me, and say we’re too attached to our children because the thought of being without them for that long hurts. And you know what? So be it. Criticize away. I love my kids and I’m not a bad parent for missing them…for wanting to talk to them every day, even if it’s only through text. I want them to know that even if they aren’t here with me physically, they are with me in my thoughts.
And I know next week, those thoughts are going to overwhelm me, and I’m going to wish they were home. Yes, I have a ton of work to do, but it’s not enough to distract me from the fact my children aren’t home. Luckily on Monday we have plans with my boyfriend’s father and on Tuesday I’m going to go see my mom and brother for the day. But after that…what to do I do? What can I do to ease the hurt?
Seriously, if any of you have suggestions please share them.
As for those of you who can’t see your kids because the other parent is alienating you, my heart goes out to you. I don’t know how you do it. You are far stronger than me.
Well I am definitely not going to criticize you. My kids have special needs and although the logical side of me says dad (we are married) can manage things for a little while – I can’t do it. I won’t go to blogging events; I won’t visit my out of state family – though I desperately need to see my dad; I won’t even attend stuff for work an hour away if I can see any way to weasel out of it. People do criticize me. Then they meet my kids. My kids are alot of work and every time they walk away with a new understanding of just what it takes to get through a day in my life. I feel for you – I really do. Deal with one day at a time. Treat yourself to a spa day. Just lay on a beach for a day – the weather is going to be perfect for the next 10 days. Catch some movies that you can’t take the kids to – yup I am really tired of cartoons… Rent some movies that you can’t watch with the kids. Read some good books – I love the Outlander series by Diana Gabaldon and let me tell you – that will take your mind off things for awhile!
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Thank you so much. I totally understand why you would rather not leave your kids. I don’t like to either. Their dad lives and hour and a half from where we live, so that’s hard enough to handle on the weekends. But his parents live north of Bangor, so it’s a LONG haul from where I am. I don’t like not being able to see them for myself and know they’re okay. Plus, there’s no WiFi at the camp they’re staying at, so I can’t Facetime my daughter unless her father takes them to Tim Horton’s.
There are a lot of people that criticize people like us, and it’s sad. We aren’t bad parents for worrying about our children. We aren’t bad parents for wanting to be there for them. I was raised by two parents that didn’t go off on their own until I was around 13, and even then it was only for a weekend. My parents thought it was more important to have family time. And I agree.
Thank you for the suggestions. I have had several people recommend Diana’s books because I loved the Sword of Truth series by Terry Goodkind. I read many genres, though, so maybe I need to finally get that library card I’ve waned. Also, there are a couple movies I’ve been wanting to watch, so it would be a good time to watch them. And take a nice LONG bubble bath. Heck…maybe with a book hand.
I can’t even imagine a long bubble bath. I can barely go potty without someone having a panic attack! Do you have a digital reader? You can borrow digital books from the library too and the Diana Gabaldon books are generally available. Another really good book is 11/22/63 by Stephen King. Not your traditional Stephen King book. If you have the opportunity to listen to it (Audible) it will be the best book EVER that you have listened to. The narrator is phenomenal and he adds such depth to the already phenomenal story. It isn’t like any book you have ever read I am sure and it isn’t at all like any other Stephen King book.
In the campground I guarantee they can hop onto someone’s open wifi. We camp at Bayleys and until this year they never had wifi except at the very front and barely even there. But I have always been able to hop onto someone else. So many people have mobile hotspots now either on their phone or as a device.
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