Years ago, before the handsome little guy below was born, I told myself I wanted to find a way to work from home. I wanted to be my own boss and have more flexible hours.
Also, I didn’t like the idea of my son going to daycare. His sister never had to because the company I worked for was also the same company as my mom, so she was able to watch my daughter once her shift was done. It worked out beautifully for me.
With my son, though, I wanted to work from home. I wanted to be around for both my kids in case they got sick or my daughter had a school activity she wanted me to attend.
But saying you want to do something and actually doing it are two different things. One involved thought. And one involved action. I was bound and determined to follow my dream, though, so I took action.
And guess what?
I found a work at home job. A couple actually.
A few months before my Binkle Bean was born, I began doing transcription work from home. I started out transcribing files for Democracy Now on a volunteer basis so I could list that on my resume before approaching other transcription companies. Because I was willing to make that sacrifice and transcribe files for free at first, I gained the knowledge needed to work for Cambridge Transcriptions and Ubiqus.
Unfortunately, though, I began having more pregnancy complications with my son and was only able to work for a couple months before I had to stop. The pain I was in from my kidneys, on top of moving into a new home and preparing for a new baby was too much for me, and I had to let my job go. But I promised myself that once I gave birth I would begin looking for work again.
Fast forward several months.
In October 2007, I landed a job with Mahalo and quickly moved up within the company until I became a remote full-time guide. During my time there I worked with some truly amazing and talented people. I acquired a lot of knowledge on writing. I learned a lot about blogging. I learned a lot about social media and the importance of networking.
And it’s because of that knowledge I gained and the help I received that ultimately led me to creating this blog. Had it not been for the help I received from Sean Percival, the co-founder of Wittlebee ,when we worked at Mahalo, I would not have the experiences I’ve had. Or this blog. That’s not to say that there weren’t others who helped me and had a hand in this, there were. But Sean was the one who helped me launch my first site and for that I will always be eternally grateful.
Since my time at Mahalo, I have worked with some great companies, including ones that again allowed me to work with those I worked with previously, including Sean. I had the privilege of working for MySpace with him and numerous others. I think we all agree that when we work together, we are one amazing team. And I hope in the future we get to again. Anytime I get to, I learn more. And as anyone who truly knows me can attest to, I have a thirst for knowledge that can’t be quenched.
As far as MySpace goes, when I tell people that I once worked for them, I usually get one of two reactions: “MySpace is still around?” or “Really? That’s SO cool.” And when the latter is said, those people are usually looking at me with reverence, as though I’m some sort of celebrity. Which I’m not. FAR FROM IT!
I think the reason people look at me like that, though, is because they’re in awe of what I’ve accomplished in my life. I’ve done things that others only dream of but never get to experience.
The thing is, I have worked EXTREMELY hard to get where I am at today. I accomplished none of what I have by being lazy and waiting for the dream jobs to fall into my lap, contrary to what others make think.
I went out into the world, researched numerous companies, submitted hundreds of applications and NEVER GAVE UP. I didn’t take no for an answer. When I wasn’t a good fit for a company, I kept moving forward and didn’t let rejections stop me.
It was that fire inside me that allowed me to publish two stories on my own. Getting picked up by a traditional publishing house is rare these days, so many talented authors have turned to the indie publishing route to see their dreams realized. And I count myself blessed to be included in that club of writers.
It’s also that same determination that is helping me build this site into what I know it can be. And what my boyfriend knows it can be.
I took a break from my site for awhile and lost the footing I had gained, but I had to in order to look out for me and my children. We went through a difficult transition in life. And I had to face my depression once again. But now that I’ve faced it, beat it and moved forward, I’m rededicated to this site and making it successful.
It also helps that I have the support of my boyfriend. There are moments where I question whether or not I’m doing the right thing or if I’m good enough. It’s during those moments when he reassures me that I have what it takes to accomplish my dream. His faith in me is unwavering and sometimes that scares me because I’m afraid I will let him down. But then he tells me the only way I will do that is by giving up. So I’m not.
Also, I want to set a good example for not just my kids, but his as well. I want them to see what hard work can accomplish. I want them to appreciate the job that those of us who work from home do. I want them to understand that people like me are not lazy and the money we earn we’ve worked for.
And I want them all to be proud of me. Nothing makes me tear up more than to hear the words, “I’m proud of you. We’re proud of you.” Except maybe “I love you”.
But I must, I still need my boyfriend to pinch me once in awhile because I wake up some mornings and wonder if all of this is real. Or am I living in a dream world of my own making? Am I really getting the opportunities I am? Am I honestly being recognized? Am I as good as other bloggers out there? Am I a talented enough writer?
Yes, I’m just like you. Though I’m determined, I still struggle with self-doubt. And I don’t know that I will ever stop doing that. And that’s okay because it’s that self-doubt that drives me to do better. I think I would worry if I started thinking I was perfect. It’s when you start getting too big for your britches that you turn into someone you’re not. And I don’t want that.
So this is me. I’m a neurotic, nerdy, ambitious, insecure, happy, tomboyish, goofy, loving mess.